Yer walaupun malam itu aku jerit2 macam halilintar..aku tepis muka orang itu sampai bedarah mulut..aku bejalan dengan penuh kompiden pegi dekat pompuan sial itu walaupun di halang oleh sanak sedara nya yang ramai sehingga menjadi tumpuan ramai...sehingga tempat itu terpaksa tutup awal,sebab polis ingat ade orang nak stat gaduh...
sebab malam tu i found out sumthing that yang sangat mengeciwakan.confession yang menyebabkan aku sangat devastated.hurmm.... i felt so hurt sampai aku tak boleh nak marah,nak nangis.All i can do is aku duduk face to face and i confront him.I bring him into conversation.I was so surprise yang aku boleh buat macam tu.Knowing me yang sangat tipis iman sabar nya...itu dah kira macam miracle.And he cried...i know he do feel d guilt.But,dat was d last thing yang aku expect akan datang.Not in d middle of aku punya masalah skang ni yang sama panas dengan penipisan ozon dunia.So i asked him d truth....
And aku diam.I tried to digest all of d things.Try to macam nak timbang2 kati yang mana betul dan yang mana salah.Yang mana aku patut pecaya.Dan yang mana aku rasa kalau aku pecaya aku takut benda tu tak betul.So...aku fikir..fikir..dan fikir.Which 1 is fair for me and which 1 is fair for him...
So..i came out with ths solution.I came to him and I gave him the night to proves me that he is right.I dunno how he will do it.But just dat night.Not more than that....
So there we go.We went there waiting for the moment.I was so weak inside nor outside.I cant even sit nonetheless standing still.So i waited in the car...Sangat penat befikir that i thot better kalau i take a nap.Just for a while.But....i pray so hard.I pray to god that if its happend that he is rite then do proves me wrong tonite.Aku tau tunggu kat satu tempat jer for dat things to come is not easy.Ths city does look very small,but it is not....
And aku terlena kejap....Not until i wake up,suddenly.So i went inside.Then i saw him standing there with his frens.Not long after dat,the moment yang aku tunggu2 is happening.
And,there it is.I was so stupid thinking about sumthing yang more beyond the truth.Macam sangat sia2 jer aku sakit kepala malam tu pikir macam2.Its really not worth it.I try so hard not to believe sumthing that is shud believes at the 1st place.If betul pun menda tu jadi macam yang aku fikir malam tu.Aku rasa aku akan blah dari tempat tu dengan tanpa rasa kesal pun,mayb aku akan drive balik umah sambil gelak2...
Pasal orang tu adalah sangat selekeh occay...owe my gawd!!!! Unforgiven sangat2!! Macam sangat apakah ko tiba2 datang kat orang tu pas2 gigit orang tu sesuka hati ngko kan.Sampai aku yang sangat kecewa malam tu tengok scar tu.Macam haram jadah!!!! Orang lain pun mabuk jugak tapi tak la bodo gigit orang sesuka hati dekat club.Dah la orang tua pulak tu.Kalau orang tu adalah sangat senonoh,mungkin aku tak akan percaya.Mungkin aku stil curious and was2.Tapi dah la selekeh+serabai+tua dan beranak 5.Hurmmmm....wat a life has gone into..
But,it is not dat dat i want to remember during dat nite.It was wat he said to me yang buat aku sedar balik.Yang all of this while i try to deny sangat....
He was right by saying that,it is not easy for us to come to ths stage,until 2day.All of the sacrification that he made just want to be with me.We do shared a lot of happiness in it.And he willing to do anything eventho it does look impossible,just to be with me.And the moment he asking me not to leave him because of dat thing,is so touching.It touched me in many ways.Sumthing yang not his mistakes.Sumthing yang he is not welcum.Coincidently is the werd.
So....i guess that is 1 of many drama that happend in my life.The drama that almost cause me sumthing that is very valuable to me or my life.It was the "relationship".
2010
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Azam gua tahun ni tak besar. Gua cuma nak gosok gigi dua kali sehari dan
pergi sembahyang raya.
1 hour ago
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